Why am I like this 

Okay y’all, I gotta rant bout somethin’.

I’m sure it’s not a new topic and you hear it all the time by now, but man do I really just hate social media sometimes (a lot of times actually — which is funny? Ironic? Because well… I’m using it right now. Kinda. Is a blog considered social media? I think so…)

Why am I letting this define so much of how I see my own life? I give it waaay too much importance, and recently I’ve been reflecting on just how badly I am addicted to it, and how much I loathe myself for it. Why do I need to use it in order to feel like my life has somehow been validated by it? 

It’s not all bad, but I’ve noticed the negative effects that it has had on my attitude and just the way I feel about myself lately — and how it just sucks me out of living in the here and now. HOW DO I JUST GET MYSELF TO PUT MY DANG PHONE DOWN!? (and if someone has life hacks for this please share your wisdom with this frustrated soul) 

I really wish with all my might that it just didn’t exist. That we actually talked to each other about what we post on Facebook. It just takes away from genuinely asking about what’s going on in each other’s lives because well, I just saw what time you woke up, where you went, and what you ate for breakfast (and lunch… and probably dinner too)  and I am so so so guilty of this. I am a chronic Snapchatter and I love the gram. But why the heck do we feel the need to show people what we are doing with our lives ALL the time? Why can’t we just live it and let that feel like it’s enough? 

Like even here in Mexico with the internet running the speed of the sloths from Zootopia, I still find myself just needing to refresh things a billion times so that they’ll post. Why. Why am I like this. What am I lacking that I’m trying to fill with social media and all it entails? 

If my parents could lead perfectly fulfilling lives without feeling the need to document it 24/7 I can too, right? So why is it so hard for me to quit it cold turkey? Technology in itself I don’t think is wrong, but gosh, for me it has definitely led to feelings of not being enough, wanting what I don’t have and ignoring all the beautiful blessings in my life, and just constantly thinking in terms of what would make a good caption, food post, what would make a funny snap etc. 

Afterall, why the heck do I care so much about what everyone else is doing? Why do I gotta show them every time I read? Why do I constantly have to be knowing what everyone is doing? 

They say habits are hard to break, but hey, God calls us to do hard things. So maybe I won’t be able to stop using social medias overnight because well, I like to keep my close friends and family informed of what’s happening in my life since we’ve all kind of become antisocial weenies (me) and don’t really asked about the deep stuff anymore. But I am definitely going to try and become more intentional/careful about what I post, and attempt to set specific times where I can go on and check it. 

Because really, I know that you guys don’t wanna see another post of what I’m eating that day or whether I worked out or not (de por si han de decir, “está tanto que se la pasa en el gym y yo la veo igual”… es que soy bien tragona raza) And that your life can go on perfectly fine without it (And if you really want to know, just ask! Food is a love language of mine. I’d love to tell ya all about it.)


Update: I am a hardcore lover of podcasts and I stumbled upon this one today (okay that’s I lie, I subscribe to TED talks; I know how nerdy, but they are awesome!) that felt super relevant to my blog post— check it out if you wanna! 


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